What next?

So, it is my day to do a blog again (this is Hayley, by the way), and it's not been a good day, so I hope you don't mind if I ramble for a minute.....or two.

This year God has really been teaching me about trust and faith. When I was young I used to always hear people talking about "casting your cares upon Jesus" and "giving it to God". I never really understood how to do that until this year.

In January my dad lost his job for the 3rd time in a year. It was devasting, not only financially, but emotionally, for him and my mom. Now, I knew that God would take care of them, I knew that they would make it through, but I just couldn't see any purpose in it. I asked God "Why? Why my dad? Why a man with a work ethic like I have never seen before? Why a man that would do anything for anyone?" The months past and still no job and no prospects. His spirits were at an all time low, my mom was a wreck, and I was starting to get really worried. It just didn't make any sense. During this time he was doing taxes to make ends meet. You see, my grandparents own a tax business that is run out of their house. So, he was getting to spend a lot of time with his parents and his family. Then, in April, we found out that my grandfather was sick and they said that what he had would kill him. It wasn't a matter of if, but when. During this time, my dad was able to spend time with my grandparents. He was able to take care of my grandfather, take him to doctor's appointments and his treatments. He was able to help finish projects around their house that my grandfather had started but couldn't finish. He was able to establish a real relationship with his father, that he had not had in years. It was a blessing in the midst of all this turmoil! My grandfather passed away in June. After 5 months of job searching, my dad finally found a job, and he started only 3 days before my grandfather passed away. 5 months of "Why's?" were answered in one moment. If it wasn't for my dad losing his job, and not being able to find another, he would have missed it all. He would have been able to do very little for my grandfather and spend very little time with him in those last months. He wouldn't have taken that back for anything, even if it meant never having lost his job. The most amazing part is that during this time, their money just strecthed, seemed to go on and on. They never really struggled financially, even though their income had been cut in half. That's impossible.......accept for the One who makes all things possible. Wow! Isn't that amazing?

All that to say God is teaching me that He is in control of everything. We may not see the reasons, or where our roads are leading, but He DOES. He knows it all. He never promised us that it would be easy, in fact sometimes it may be harder. His promise is that He will always be there, not only walking with us as we go, but waiting at the end of our roads too. How awesome is that? How much less stressful is life to go through knowing that? It almost makes worrying seem so silly.

So, this brings me to today. On the way home from work today, my car broke down.....in the middle of the road. Now my car is about 10 years old, and it's been through a lot. If you have seen it, you know that one side is completely smashed in. It also has about 150,000 miles on it. So, I just have this nagging feeling that whatever is wrong is not going to be fixable or is going to cost more than the car is worth to fix. Add to that, Jason and I have no money at this moment. Literally, $25 in the bank. What the heck are we going to do? I don't know.....but God does. I am so thankful for this year, I am so thankful for these things that keep happening, because it reminds me that God is so in control. I have no control, nor do I want it. It's like He keeps taking the control away from me (I might prefer He do this in other ways ;)), but I am certainly not going to fight it.

So, If there is something you are going through that seems too big for you to handle, or even if it's small enough that you think you can handle it on your own, DON'T. Give it to God, there is nothing too big or too small for Him to handle. If you are like I used to be, and you are not sure how to "Give it to God" or "Cast all your cares", let me know, I will be glad to walk you through it :)

Please be praying for us as we figure out (i.e. God figures out) what the heck we are going to do about our car. Oh, and if you happen to have an extra car or an extra $10,000 lying around, we would be happy to take it off your hands ;)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11